Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe: Gift of the Magi?

Christmas, for the lovely Lesbian Housewyfe, seems to be a turbulent time. For instance, as a people, Americans spend the time leading up to that day of good cheer diving into shopping malls and factory outlet stores, desperately searching for the perfect gift for everyone on their little Christmas lists. […]

Gift of the Magi?

Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe: The Party Guide

Recently, the lovely Lesbian Housewyfe faced a common situation: my wonderful wyfe came home and, as she walked through the door, said, “How about we give a party?” I considered a moment, realizing that this could transform two days of my quiet life into total chaos in exchange for a […]

Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe: The Party Guide

Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe: Clearing Out Before the Fall

Ahh, spring cleaning. A wonderful tradition dating back to the dawn of mankind. Me? I gave it up years ago. The tradition basically ended with the dawn of womankind. The whole idea gives me the creeps. The lovely Lesbian Housewyfe’s relieving factor is, of course, Lesbian Law #20: Household duties […]

Clearing Out Before the Fall

Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe: When Icons Collide

I love popular culture. Well, really, by definition, everybody loves popular culture. I mean, otherwise it wouldn’t be popular, would it? Like June Cleaver, some of us are destined to become a part of popular culture. Like me, some of us are destined to just enjoy it. Pop culture happenings […]

When Icons Collide

Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe: Springtime Makeovers

I am sitting in the sun in a ragged piece of lawn furniture. The brick red paint is chipping off the soft wood and the pillow which kindly softens the slatted backrest and woven seat has lost gobs of its stuffing. I don’t care. The rays from the sun are […]

Springtime Makeover

Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe: She’s a Working Girl

By now, I’m sure you’re thinking, “Well, that little baby dyke ‘Lesbian Housewyfe’ is just a Generation X slacker who’s trying to cover up her lack of a job by turning her life into a series of anecdotes.” Not quite, Charlie. I don’t just stay at home even though that […]

She's a Working Girl

Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe: Parental Strategies

Nothing strikes fear into the hearts of homosexuals quite like a visit to the in-laws. Except perhaps a visit from the in-laws. Or maybe that time when your baby’s Mom showed up on the front porch with all her stuff. Anyway, yours truly saw her parents make the trek all […]

DLH Parental Strategies

Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe: The Basic Model

Back in 1995, I began my writing journey with my “Diary of a Lesbian Housewyfe” essays. For the next several weeks, I’m going to #TBThursday with one of these essays. Let’s start the journey with The Basic Model. *** Hello. My name is LA Bourgeois. I am a Lesbian Housewyfe. I don’t know […]

The Basic Model